About a shoot with Gerrit Starczewski...

... it was february 2009.

somewhere between germany and the netherlands

i don't exactly know anymore...

i only remember that it was really cold. i was tired and shivering.

very very cold february day... or more evening.. or rather night...

the entire winter 08/09 my friends and i

tried to find cheap ways to travel, taking cheap flights to london

and car lifts to berlin, paris, antwerp etc where ever...

i don't remember if the car lift had canceled our drive or why....

but my friend Kitty and i took different trains to get to the location.

the photographer Gerrit Starczewski picked us up at the station.

we were tired and exhausted...

and that's what i don't remember

why we were so late?

cause we actually planned to hang out and

shoot the entire afternoon.

maybe we did party the days before.

i just don't remember.

weird

...and sad...

kitty and i even danced and jumped through his living room...

did he have a trampoline?

i remember gerrit playing Lex by Ratatat for me.

that's how him and me met for the first time... at the ratatat concert.

me, wearing a rosary on my head and going crazy.

dancing... like a mad person in the front row..

me

dancing

listening

sweating

forgetting

like a dark hippie with the cross on my forehead...

the cross swinging while i was moving more and more...

i even have the pictures before leaving for the concert.

George and i were getting ready (dressed) at his place...

wow amazing times

it must have been november or october 2008...

ratatat concert in cologne...

me

imagining stories and fantasies

thats really possible with ratatat music...

wow

i went to so many concerts in 2008...

many memories and soundtracks in my head for many things.

i had forgotten that i had those pics...

i just didn't look at them that often afterwards

and was surprised seeing them again last week.

i kept on skipping through them several times...

they just captured me.

looking at the pictures now i think they are fascinating.

maybe it's the colours...

or the memory...

maybe the period?

past winter?

the pain and the joy i often felt

i don't really know.

i really like looking at the pictures.

i remember that i didn't have this feeling

when he send them to me in march this year..

i did not appreciate those images that much.

but now i do.

they are special to me.

danke gerrit

vor allem für deine geduld und deine ehrliche erfrischende person.

du, ganz einfach.

ich war ein verblendet als wir uns kennenlernten

ich konnte die zeit mit dir nicht wertschätzen

ich freue mich aber schon auf ein wiedersehen...

peace love and harmony mein freund

xh